The Impact of a Teacher

A few months ago, I attended the funeral of a dear friend of 23 years. Dave and I taught and coached together for a number of years.  At the funeral were some of our former students. Now, I normally dislike the "open mic time" that has become vogue at funerals as of late. Allowing anyone to stand up and say a few words about the deceased.  But, on this particular day, a couple of those former students (now grown men with families of their own) each took a turn saying more than a few words completely off the cuff.

The speakers talked about the impact that this man had on their lives. That impact was deeper than some of the long forgotten daily curricular lessons.  They wanted to talk about the person, the passion he had for working with his students, the life lessons he was able to pass on, sometimes in the classroom and sometimes on the field.  They didn't talk about what he taught them, as much as how he taught them.  Never allowing them to give less than HE expected of them which was often more that they had expected of themselves.  At the time, they didn't always like or appreciate it.  Now, they understood.

One of those former students told of this man teaching his students to be proud of who they were, where they were from, and what they represent.  He took that advice to heart and being a Native American chose to go work at the Meskwaki Settlement near Tama.  He works with Native American youth and helped start the Meskwaki Settlement School football program.  He talked about now passing those same life lessons he learned on to the youth he now works with.  Every time he teaches or coaches a child he uses the techniques, analogies and lessons that Dave had taught him.  Not only impacting one generation, but generations to come. It was these statements that really started me thinking about the true impact of a teacher.

We are given a rare gift when we get to teach children.  We have often heard that, as teachers, we raise up the doctors, lawyers, CEO's, nurses, mechanics, who go on to become productive leaders in their communities.  What we often don't realize is that when we touch a life of a child we can be touching generations to come.  We often teach like we were taught (the good and the bad). If this is true, then this next generation will teach as we taught them (also the good and the bad).  This is powerful stuff. It is also a tremendous responsibility.

Our students may or may not remember specific skills or lessons we teach daily, but they will remember HOW we teach them. They will be impacted by the person teaching them, the passion they teach with, and how that person made them feel everyday.  Each moment during a day in school is a gift.  A rare opportunity to make a difference, have an impact.  It's a big responsibility, but as a couple former students reminded me as we said goodbye to a friend and a mentor, its worth it.

The Oscars, Humor, and Bullying/Harassment

I love a good joke, and I have been known to participate in good natured kidding.  As I was watching the Oscars last night and following the #Oscars twitter feed, something became alarmingly obvious to me.  We just don't get this whole bullying and harassment issue!

I invite you to get on YouTube and/or find #Oscar on twitter, review some of the humor from last night and come to your own conclusions.  We try to teach our young people that making fun at other's expense is not appropriate.  It is a form of bullying.  We also try to teach our children that bullying comes from an imbalance of power and using your position or influence with others to bully/harass another is not tolerated.  So, how does this refer to the Oscars and why should we care?

Much of the humor during the Oscars broadcast was directed at someone, made fun of someone.  Now, since most of the targets were adults in show business, they probably expected it.  Some of them were obviously in on the joke or "skit".  My concern is the impression that it has on people who are easily influenced by media and entertainment, such as our children.

Many kids stayed up to watch all or part of the Oscars.  For many, its a fun event. But we, as a society can't keep giving entertainment media (i.e. Hollywood) a pass on this issue.  In my experience, children often times do what the adults allow.  They also mimic the "cool" things that we adults do, like drink, smoke, and make jokes at other people's expense.

If Seth McFarland makes fun of Ben Affleck in front his peers, and in front of say 1 billion viewers, (and Ben seems to kind of chuckle along) it comes off as cool and okay to do.  "See, Ben's laughing too, it must be okay!" How, many times are kids made fun of in front of peers or in front of a crowd (imbalance of power) and they have little recourse but to try to laugh it off? "See, Sally's laughing she must be okay with it!"  One of the skills we try to teach kids in dealing with bullies is to act like it's not bothering you, interesting.....could it be that some of the adults being poked fun at during the Oscars were using this same strategy?

Some of the jokes, (or attempt at jokes) where simply sexist, racist, or in general poor taste.  Very pointed.  Now, I know that this is just my opinion.  I also know that this is my blog and you can stop reading anytime you like.  Making some of the sexist comments and jokes that were made last night could be grounds for sexual harassment if done in the work place or in school. Simple as that.  As far as the racist comments or jokes, I consider that one of the lowest forms of humor.  My initial reaction is, "Aren't we past this as a society by now?"  We all know that in this day and age this kind of humor isn't appropriate in any setting!

The twitter world was all a buzz during the Oscars.  Some of it was informative, some entertaining.  Much of the twitter comment was, again, making fun at someone's expense.  Most of them were coming from regular schleps like me (not that we should get a pass either), but there were some famous, notable people making some harassing comments. Comments that, if a young person would read them, would come off as funny, cool, and okay to do (some adults might take that way as well).  No, its not okay.  Again, we have to stop giving entertainers the pass on these types of behaviors under the guise of it being "entertainment."

Check the videos and #Oscar tweets from last night.  Are these the kind of comments that we would accept as okay from our children, or are they an overt form of bullying and harassment?  You make the call!